Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
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Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
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WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him