my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
