Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize