That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
