the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
