Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
