a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
