I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
