My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
His nipple licking is glorious
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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