Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
