I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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