I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize