I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
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you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
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He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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