just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
We named our party play list daddy issues
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
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