My friends, they love my intelligence
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
