Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
