okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We talked him into tasing himself.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
