god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
