There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize