I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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