Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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