I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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