My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
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