Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
