I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
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My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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