Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
