Your tits are I can't wait for
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Dick very happy bro
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
