How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
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Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
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Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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