I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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