who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize