She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He shit in the fireplace
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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