with your own penis?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
home. puking in laundry basket.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
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