She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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