I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
There's always time for handjobs
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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