Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
