So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
