You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize