the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
