i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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