I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
