I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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