I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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