and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
