I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize