Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
