Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.