So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So much rum. So many feels.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.