does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize