***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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