The maid of honor just puked.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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