Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize