Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
