shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
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