What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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